She was an active lady who used to drive and go about town, traveling widely enjoying life and all its delights of sight, sound and taste, enjoying her retirement from working in the office, even in her seventieth decade. Then she had a fall and broke her hip. Now she's 80 years old, living in an old folks' home, mostly bed-ridden, needing help to get up and sit down and only walking very slowly with the walker.
She has 3 children: a son and a daughter who're married with children who have their own lives and families to take care of and who decided it's best for mother to stay in the nursing home because she was all alone in the house and if she fell again, no one would be there. There is a third and youngest son, who had worked in the seas and had not married, but because of a motorbike accident, now has only one leg and walks on crutches, and lives in a senior citizens' home here in KL.
He would ride his motorcyle all the way from KL to Ipoh several times a year to visit his mother. "She was a very beautiful lady," he told us showing us an old photo of hers proudly. Once she even danced with our Datuk Lum, the president of the NACSCOM, during her senior citizens club days.
But since his last visit early this year during the Chinese New Year holidays, he had not been able to make another trip because of his own ailments. So we went yesterday.
The Home was like a scene from a horror movie about old sick people lying around in various catatonic states. A single-storey bungalow with 4 rooms filled with beds and reclining chairs everywhere, with silent immobile old men and women. One old woman who was sitting in a rattan chair outside in the compound near the door began to shout at us, scolding us in a Chinese dialect which we couldn't understand with great anger and hatred. She continued railing to the air after we moved to another part and sat at a table to talk.
There was no nurse or caretaker around at the time we visited, about 2.30 pm after lunch. There are 5 maids who care for the 70 over residents and we saw some lying resting on mattresses on the floor between the beds. There was no talking, no music, no sound, except for the voice of the woman who had begun to rail. Three old folks were playing mahjong at the only other table next to us in the compound.
Sally seemed to be the only one conscious, alert, and alive, but physically trapped there: she could see and hear and speak good English to us. "What to do?" she smiled bitterly. "It's all fated." Her son and she agreed that it must be punishment for her having enjoyed her life so much in the past. But when we prayed for her before we left, our hands holding her, she had tears in her eyes and said "Thank you" several times. "Look to God, call out to him. You are not alone. It's not all wasted."
Is this what life is? To be born, work and suffer, steal as much enjoyment as we can, and then wait to die?
As Moses wrote in Psalm 90:
9 All our days pass away under your wrath;
we finish our years with a moan.
10 The length of our days is seventy years—
or eighty, if we have the strength;
yet their span is but trouble and sorrow,
for they quickly pass, and we fly away.
11 Who knows the power of your anger?
For your wrath is as great as the fear that is due you.
12 Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
13 Relent, O LORD! How long will it be?
Have compassion on your servants.
14 Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love,
that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.
15 Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us,
for as many years as we have seen trouble.
16 May your deeds be shown to your servants,
your splendour to their children.
17 May the favour of the Lord our God rest upon us;
establish the work of our hands for us—
yes, establish the work of our hands.
O Lord, be with Sally, and also her son here. Let them see and know You and Your glory and Your love for them. Let them come to know Your peace and Your joy.
For "... this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent." John 17:3
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Until Christ is Formed in You
I know God, or rather am known by Him; I have been redeemed by Him, I am His child, and also an heir! (Galatians 4) What can be more mind-blowing than these thoughts?
And what does God require of His child? He wants me to become like Him: He wants to form Christ in me.
And how does He want me to live?
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." (Ephesians 5:1,2)
And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature. (Romans 13:8-14)
And what does God require of His child? He wants me to become like Him: He wants to form Christ in me.
And how does He want me to live?
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." (Ephesians 5:1,2)
Love, for the Day is Near
"Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet,"a]"> and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself." Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature. (Romans 13:8-14)
Monday, September 14, 2009
Another dream and message
I dreamt I was at a camp somewhere like the one in Harvest Haven, Gopeng. It was the last day and people were packing to go home. But I was carrying a child, walking around the grounds outside, and enjoying the child. When I finally went to pack up, I found my wallet all cleaned out: not a single note, coin or card remaining. Then, the regret came over me: why oh why was I so careless, why did I leave my wallet in the handbag lying there just for someone to pick up? How was I to get home without a card or cash to fill up petrol in the car? And oh, the inconvenience of having to make the police reports and apply for new IC and other cards.
David had driven off and I was talking with Chin Hoe about how I should tell the caretaker of the camp and call all the staff to investigate the theft. Mercifully, it was then that I woke up: it was 7.30 am and it was a dream! Oh, what a relief I felt!
But then I knew there was a message for me: Beware, be careful, lest you lose all that is dear and valuable to you. A little carelessness and all may be lost. "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest- and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man." Proverbs 6:10,11
We have been listening in church to John Piper (DVD) teaching us that we must Fight for Joy or faith which are synonymous: it's a struggle, a war, a fight that is hard. We must be alert and always vigilant, with enemies without and within. The goal is to finish well, to fight the good fight, to finish the race, to keep the faith, not to lose that first love and grow cold, but to stay HOT, HOT, HOT!
And I have been memorising the book of James, after coming back from the church camp in Gracehill Lodge, Bukit Tinggi, and I've finished Chapter 1. It tells me to not merely listen to the word and so deceive myself, but to do it, to look intently into the perfect law that gives freedom and continue to do this, not forgetting what I have heard, but doing it. It tells me to humbly accept the word planted in me which can save me. Otherwise, I will be deceiving myself and my religion will be worthless.
Father God, thank you for speaking to me through your word and through the dream. Help me to awaken and renew my commitment and zeal for you. Forgive me my laziness and carelessness, and forgive me the sins of my tongue and my mind. Please forgive my family too, and my church, for our lukewarmness or coldness, and for sinning against one another and against you with our tongues and with our deeds and omissions. Father, please awaken us all to love you and to seek you with all our hearts, minds, souls and strength, to be zealous for you, to burn for you, or else we will die in our self-deception and worthless religion.
In Jesus' name, I do pray and ask all these and more.
David had driven off and I was talking with Chin Hoe about how I should tell the caretaker of the camp and call all the staff to investigate the theft. Mercifully, it was then that I woke up: it was 7.30 am and it was a dream! Oh, what a relief I felt!
But then I knew there was a message for me: Beware, be careful, lest you lose all that is dear and valuable to you. A little carelessness and all may be lost. "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest- and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man." Proverbs 6:10,11
We have been listening in church to John Piper (DVD) teaching us that we must Fight for Joy or faith which are synonymous: it's a struggle, a war, a fight that is hard. We must be alert and always vigilant, with enemies without and within. The goal is to finish well, to fight the good fight, to finish the race, to keep the faith, not to lose that first love and grow cold, but to stay HOT, HOT, HOT!
And I have been memorising the book of James, after coming back from the church camp in Gracehill Lodge, Bukit Tinggi, and I've finished Chapter 1. It tells me to not merely listen to the word and so deceive myself, but to do it, to look intently into the perfect law that gives freedom and continue to do this, not forgetting what I have heard, but doing it. It tells me to humbly accept the word planted in me which can save me. Otherwise, I will be deceiving myself and my religion will be worthless.
Father God, thank you for speaking to me through your word and through the dream. Help me to awaken and renew my commitment and zeal for you. Forgive me my laziness and carelessness, and forgive me the sins of my tongue and my mind. Please forgive my family too, and my church, for our lukewarmness or coldness, and for sinning against one another and against you with our tongues and with our deeds and omissions. Father, please awaken us all to love you and to seek you with all our hearts, minds, souls and strength, to be zealous for you, to burn for you, or else we will die in our self-deception and worthless religion.
In Jesus' name, I do pray and ask all these and more.
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